I was walking down the street the other day, you know, enjoying how the Scottish winds make me feel like Mulan in battle when, suddenly, someone tapped me on the shoulder, scaring the bubbles out of me. ‘Hey, I noticed your braids — do you like reggae?’ It was a guy around my age. I replied ‘No.’ with emphasis on the period, and power-walked on.

Today I want to dedicate this post to just telling you a bit about the history and background of my head-full of snakes, which I’ve been proudly sporting since May. And yes I’m aware I sound like a Stepford wife about to gloat about her recipe for The Perfect Pancake, but allow. It’s time to get #Braiducated.

REASONS WHY I BRAID MY HAIR:

1. Self-respect

For a long ass time, I put the expectations of others above my own needs and wellbeing. I cared way too much about being liked, whether by family, friends or team mates. Right now, I’m at a point where I just want to focus on work, finishing uni, getting fit, and there’s no room for being a pushover. By dedicating 10-20 minutes every morning to concentrating on rebraiding my hair, I start the day feeling centered and calm. This is me, taking control of my time and reminding myself that I need to put the same amount of focus into the things I care about.

2. To be just better

In ancient China, hair was highly valued as the body, and has always been a symbol of ethnicity, class status and an expression of individuality. The Manchus introduced the queue (bianzi 辮子) to China in the 17th century, which saw boys shaving the front of their head and braiding the rest into one long braid.

That One Braid represented dignity, manhood and dedication to the good of the nation over personal benefits. And while I don’t quote Confucius on the daily, I love the idea of pride in one’s culture and dedication to the utilitarian good of the community. My braids remind me to stay focused on the bigger picture and not to pursue the materialistic.

3. A reminder

Braids are central to a lot of cultures amongst ethnic minorities in China, especially Uygur in Xin Jiang. They even have contests where women compete on who can braid the fastest. There’s so much beauty to be found in these dying traditions, that after seeing them, and then having to witness a bunch of Rich Second Generation kids (富二代) flaunting their neon green Ferraris outside Gongti clubs, you lose a little hope in the progression of humanity. Sometimes, the glass and glossy can mean positive things – the level of development of a country, the well-being of citizens – but honestly, somedays I just feel like things were better in the past.

When you visit non-first-tier cities in China, you already see a huge difference in values. On the six-hour train journey from Anhui to Beijing, there were two little kids sitting in front of me and my sister. At one point, they passed us a little note accompanied with a fit of giggles. It said Hello and asked what we were doing. So we started chatting on this little piece of paper.

When I asked the sister, who was eight years old, what her dream was, she said she wanted to go to Harvard. I think my dream at eight was to be a policewoman or Avril. What depressed me about her level of maturity was that she had kind of already given up on that dream: she said her family didn’t have the money, that her mom and dad didn’t even live in Anhui with her – they were both in Beijing, hustling multiple jobs to support their extended family back home – and that she didn’t know English.

I’ve never felt more helpless than in that moment. I’ve been privileged to be able to see my parents often, and read as many books as I want. This conversation with an eight-year-old reminded me that life isn’t about having more money or more properties or more bling…it’s about a deeply rooted dream that seems impossible, but that you nevertheless hold onto, hoping that one day the miraculous can take place. And when that day does happen, you should ignore the waves of complacency, and aim to help the dreamers who are scared to dream.

4. Stay Young forever

In the past, young unmarried Chinese girls would wear their hair in a plait fastened with a strong of red wool, or have two braids on either side. I researched a bit and found out that a compliment back in the day was ‘She has two pigtails that dance to her movements’. How cute is that! So if braids connote youthfulness, and youthfulness means embracing change and uncertainty with playful and optimistic eyes, then I want to hold onto both for as long as possible.

5. Success comes after hard work. Don’t rely on a shortcut.

A,B,C,D… the alphabet works as a sequence. You can’t sing out the entire alphabet by heart by jumping around randomly. You’ll miss out on some important letters.

When I start from a freshly washed head of hair (sounds like I’m washing salad lol), and I start on that first braid, the end result seems so damn far. I know it’s gonna be at least another 20 minutes until I finish. But by focusing on each braid, and accepting that there is no shortcut, I feel determined. And I always end up with a head full of completed braids.

Lesson here: Do the work, don’t be lazy, don’t rely on Guanxi/connections or tricks. Life is all but a process that you need to keep stretching and reaching for.

6. Don’t conform.

When I was studying at Beida, I would wear just t-shirt and jeans to class. Not because I was lazy, but because that was just what everyone else wore, and life was easier if you just blended in.

Now I realize how dangerous that can be. It’s one thing to dress the same as everyone, but another to think the same. Everything you’re thinking of has already been done and thought of before – how scary is that? Perhaps the best way to promote truly unique thinking is so nurture individuality and celebrate differences. The Public Eye is extremely bitchy, and I feel like kids need to be trained from a young age that they shouldn’t act according to the Others.

I’m aware my braids kind of look creepy from behind, and Chinese parents everywhere are crying a little. But you know what? This is just step one of getting off that bandwagon.

WOO. There goes the longest list I’ve ever compiled on this blog. My braids represent things I believe in, mostly related to tradition and motivation, and nothing to do with pop culture or anything exclusively ‘cool’. I’m just watering this seed everyday and hoping that I can strengthen my dedication muscles so that I can grow and make a difference.

I guess what I’m trying to say with this post is just embrace what makes you feel good. Do things with intention and passion. Learn to say no. Do yoga. Go to the sauna. Eat well. Treat people with respect. Learn everything about the one thing you love. Give more and expect less.